Hello, everyone. My husband and I have been married since we were 19 and it’s been 10 years since our wedding.
Over the years we had a few bumps on the road. I found out he was watching porn (which I am not happy about but I don’t think it’s that big of a deal).
Later I found out he registered on a few dating and “cheating” sites. I’ve looked at a few of those accounts and he never chatted with anyone, just “liked” the pics or sometimes not even that. I guess he was just looking. However, he did put up his real picture on match.com. We had a big fight and he swore he didn’t have any intention of meeting anyone, just wanted to see if girls still like him or not since he was married for so long.
A few months ago I found out that he’s been going out with his coworkers to strip clubs on his work trips. He would tell me that he is super tired and will be going to sleep, then he would hang up and go out.
He’s a pilot so he’s away a lot. When I confronted him he said he’s sorry and doesn’t want to lose me and that he doesn’t know why he was lying to me.
Then, after about 2 weeks I decided to check his phone with a phone recovery software. So I found a text thread with one of his male coworkers who sent my husband pictures and a video of one of the flight attendants who my husband worked with a lot. She was totally naked in the pics and video. So my husband kept those until his last day of his work trip and then deleted them.
However, on one of his later trips, he texted that same male co-worker to send him the pics and video again. And the story repeated. He deleted everything before he got home. I told him that I knew and that we should separate. He begged me to stay. In the end, I agreed to stay only if we go to a counselor.
It’s been 4 months since we only went to counseling once. Just now I found out he’s been looking at that flight attendant’s Facebook account, as well as searching other girls and then deleting his search history.
Not sure what to do with all that. I’m pretty sure he hasn’t cheated on me yet. I just stopped trusting him.
Am I overreacting?