A few months ago I asked all my students to answer two questions:
1. Ten things you want your parents to stop doing and
2. Five things you want your parents to start doing.
I got some interesting responses:
Things I want my parents to stop doing:
--- Stop comparing my life with your childhood. Things were really different back then, so stop comparing.
--- Stop using these words and phrases: Use your brains? Are you deaf? Can't you see? You're useless, careless, good for nothing, lazy, etc.
--- Stop showing off my skills. I don't want to dance in front of your friends. I don't like to do that. Why do you force me to sing/dance or show my report card or my art work to our relatives or friends?
--- Can you speak softly for a change? I'm tired of hearing you shout, every day, every single moment.
Things I want my parents to start doing:
--- Smile, please. I don't remember when was the last time my mom smiled. She usually carries a frown on her face. That look saddens and irritates me.
--- Appreciate. I know I'm not good at all things, but there are many things that only I can do really well which no one else can. So a little bit appreciation would really help.
--- Hug me. I see how my mom hugs my 5 year old sister, but when I run to hug her she immediately says, "Later, first do you work" huh!
--- Play with me. I love to play with my friends, but playing with mom and dad is fun! If only they made some time to play with me.
--- Tell me a story. I'd love to listen to their childhood tales, especially about their mistakes, failures and mischief. But my parents always keep telling about all their achievements. It makes me scared. What if I can't achieve success the way they achieved it?
--- Keep that WhatsApp aside. Talk to me, mom & dad.
--- Can I sleep in your bedroom at least once a month? I love cuddling you guys.
So parents, if you're wondering what to gift your child this holiday season, here's your list. Be present for your children
MOTIVE