Parenting, Top 5, Happy Family, Lifestyle

The Happiest Children live in the Netherlands! At least, to this conclusion came experts UNICEF. And the bulk of this happiness itself is not at all the lack of homework in the school or the opportunity to play where and when you want, but for a healthy atmosphere in the family and the emotional well-being of the Parents. The Dutch approach to education differs from the principles we are familiar with, and moms are always calm and balanced. Do you want to know what is the secret?

Principles of Child Rearing

Do not engage in self-sacrifice

"Children do not change your life, they complement it!" Perhaps, this is the main principle, which entails all subsequent.

At us some women are simply "obligated" to be engaged in self-sacrifice, to pay career, a family and necessarily youth and beauty for motherhood. And later, when the screaming baby grows up, it's imperative to remind him of the sacrifices that his birth and upbringing cost him so that he does not accidentally get bored without an infinite sense of guilt and debt to exhausted parents.

Dutch mothers, on the contrary, are doing everything possible to ensure that their lives are complete and harmonious without any sacrifice. Moms work, meet with friends and find time for any of their interests and hobbies that were in their lives before the birth of the child. In the Netherlands, the appearance of a child does not turn a family into a suffering organism, which revolves around an infinitely weeping "lump of happiness".

Instead of constantly complaining about exhausting cleaning and cooking - there is a washing machine, a robotic vacuum cleaner and pre-prepared foods bought in a supermarket. Instead of stupid walks around the yard with the goal of putting the child to sleep - a joint trip on business, for the youngest ones there is a kindergarten.

But most importantly, there is no "I am a mother", but there is only a family in which the father does not consider replacing diapers on a child or washing dishes with something that belittles his male dignity.

Do not feel guilty

The mother who sacrifices, has got used to scour herself for any reason: she put a hat on her child or stopped breastfeeding too early. In the Netherlands, society tells you: "First, put on the oxygen mask on yourself, and only then on the baby." And no sense of guilt!

A child does not need an exhausted and nervous mother. To be a really good mom and yet remain a person, you need a huge emotional resource, which you can not get out of a sense of guilt.

Do not get hung up on things

The softest Japanese diapers, hypoallergenic napkins and extra-shampoo are not needed by a child. Mom needs them and only so that she can realize that she gives the child only the best, which means she is a good mother.

Practical residents of the Netherlands think it is foolish to spend on what the child will grow in a month or two. Therefore, in Amsterdam, the culture of second hand and sharing of things is considered normal. For example, special gambling halls for children are scattered all over the city, where you can take for a while any toys, like books in the library.

The natural course of things - it's good!

Dutch children play all their free time, because it is in the game that a little person learns the world best. At home, in the street, at school, in a restaurant, in any weather, in sand and mud - a Dutch kid plays when he likes. Dutch mothers carelessly give children with snot in the garden, treat the common cold with paracetamol and do not buy hard shoes as soon as the baby starts walking.

Looking at all this from us, the shocked mom immediately wants to wrap up, heal and scold the child, because to take this natural course of things is very difficult for us. But, choosing between the natural environment and the greenhouse, is it not more correct to choose the first?

Accept the child as he is

It seems that there is nothing unusual here, because every parent loves his child. But between love and acceptance there is a significant difference - every loving parent has a stable notion of how his child should grow up.

But the child is not a project! We replace care with the requirement to fulfill the set goals, we try to teach all the time instead of showing how to study, we are still convinced that a diploma with honors is the guarantee of a happy future for the child.

Of course, Dutch mothers are demanding on their blond children, but they are not at all focused on evaluations and achievements: they will not force a child to enter a prestigious university, if he does not clearly want this university, they will not torture him for several years at a music school if the child clearly does not have the ability and desire to play the piano. Every child develops at his own pace, and it's true!

But most importantly - in the Netherlands you will never see and hear how mother screams at your child, you will not see how she pulls out or publicly punishes the baby. This is how the correct education of children looks like through the eyes of the Dutch.

Be sure to share your views on the Dutch upbringing in the comments!

June 7, 2018

Happy Family