If you've lived through the hell of public middle school, you're probably familiar with the markers for sexual experiences: first base, second base, third base, and home run.
The inexplicable baseball-themed terms are pretty dated — it's 2018, and we're still defining relationships by "how far" they've physically gone?
A meme poking fun at tired sexual expectations has been making its rounds on Twitter, pointing out that relationships involve way more than just sex.
Chris Liner
first base: sex second base: day drunk shopping third base: saving the bees home run: discussing the political circumstances of the freedom of bobby shmurda
The first base meme jokes that younger people are more open to sexual experiences — thanks to accessible birth control and comprehensive sex ed — but the realest challenge for the newer generation is vulnerability and genuine romantic interest.
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1st base: sex 2nd base: hitting each other up when the sun is out 3rd base: sharing childhood trauma home run: verbally expressing romantic interest
Most variations of the meme were sweet: when casual sex is widely accepted in progressive societies, people can actually spend time getting to know each other after.
ѕαм ◡̈
first base: sex second base: sharing music third base: sharing ugly childhood photos fourth base: hanging out during the day time
hispanic pixie dream girl
First base: sex Second base: actually hanging out again Third base: seeing me cry Fourth base: unconditional love & support
JSTJosh
first base: sex second base: good morning texts third base: singing in the car together homerun: meeting their family
*.°❁
first base: sex second base: forehead kisses third base: making you playlists homerun: caring about your mental health
Other versions of the meme were more pessimistic about romance.
jaboukie young-white
first base: watching their instagram stories and replying second base: third base: home run:
Why is this so relatable?
saltlick
first base: actually texting back second base: sending pics of my dogs third base: sending demos that are vaguely about the person home run: meeting up in a neutral location once & being awkward the whole time
Rock Lee
First base: sex Second base: me getting too attached and smothering you Third base: you break up with me
Luqmaan Khan
First Base: Having sex Second Base: Making eye contact Third Base: Falling in love with the person and deleting Tinder Home Run: Starting an open relationship and downloading Tinder again
Some Twitter users had more absurd romantic expectations.
ⓥ
first base: sex second base: talking about anime third base: watching anime together home run: watching 700+ episodes of naruto together
ℤℝ
first base: sex second base: sharing recipes third base: going to the grocery store fourth base: erotic lasagna role play
Existential Comics
First base: talking about Sartre. Second base: talking about Heidegger. Third base: talking about Hegel. Home run: admitting you've only read the Wikipedia pages.
buck mcneely
first base: your swamp gets overrun with fairytale creatures second base: rescue a princess from a tower third base: deliver her to lord farquaad to clear out the swamp home run: crash the wedding with a dragon and turn her into an ogre
And let's be real, would it even be a good Twitter meme if there wasn't a "Mr. Brightside" reference thrown in?
E L I J A H M A N N
first base: falling asleep second base: calling a cab third base: having a smoke home run: taking a drag
There are still 205 days until Valentine's Day, so don't worry: You still have time to find someone to watch 700 episodes of Naruto with.